Phones are used daily, hourly, by the minute, depending on whether it's for work or leisure. Daily usage, to the point that we see today, has already become an issue. When the issue of addiction is brought up, there's a deeply negative connotation. One may think of alcohol or drugs first, so there is a question of the severity of addiction to phones. Why would people be addicted? There are many possible answers, some along the lines of "there is no issue," "it's the time we live in," "no one thinks for themselves," or "it's all phones." Either way, there is room for discussion. Especially amongst early teens in the past few years. Since the rise of smartphones in the early 2010s, the expectation of having one, either to fit in or just be able to communicate with parents, has become an everyday-normal situation. The more smartphones become normalized, the younger the children who receive them. While at first it might have been college life to have one, it became high school, and then middle school, and even now, elementary school. Parents, amongst everyone, are feeling concerned for their children's safety while away from them, but with free access to smartphones, is there really a safety belt coming from them?
While there are differences in the addiction to social media versus the smartphone itself, there are problems within both. For example, Weill Cornell Medicine researchers found that "by 14, almost one in three participants had a high addictive use trajectory for social media and one in four for mobile phones." The usage of social media and smartphones can be separated by the way they are used. While on social media, the concept of "doomscrolling" (Margaret para. 10) pulls together mindlessly scrolling at content that does not interest the user, nor bring any value to them, just experiencing being online in the moment without consciousness—it can affect the user negatively. However, an addiction to the smartphone itself may be seen through constantly playing games on it, using it for other things such as text and call; it is more than just the doomscroll, but it still may be a problem. Dr. Xiao at Weill Cornell Medicine tracked nearly 4,300 youth, aged 9–10 at the start of their research. Her research pulled together how their total screen time usage was harmful. The researchers found that using social media and smartphones showed patterns associated with suicidal behaviors in the children. They were even at a two to three times greater risk of suicidal behaviors due to that, as opposed to the children who had low usage of social media and smartphones (Mann para. 8).
So, how is this an issue that can be solved? Well, by creating a space for children to understand the effects and how their usage of smartphones is truly impactful, there will be a way for them to open up about online issues they may feel strongly about. Children are less likely to bring up the feeling of needing to be online if they know their parents will punish them, take the phone away completely, etc. If you, as the parent, talk to your child, tell them that they should not necessarily feel a physical pull towards the smartphone—but wanting to talk with their friends is okay—there will be that openness to talking. Additionally, give your child the option for other stimulations. Put them in some sort of sport they want to do, give them the materials to write or draw or read if they are more interested in that; there are options that do not even have to cost anything, that are better than them sitting and staring at their smartphone for hours on end. You can even switch the smartphone out for something more old-tech, a flip phone, a phone with a sliding keyboard, something they can put stickers on and decorate, and only call and text. They can still have access to the parts that will not hurt them as badly, by allowing them to communicate and still interact with their friends.
While yes, the children may still need access to immediate communication with the parent, there are smart ways to go about it. Kara Alaimo writes, "for every year before the age of 13 that a person acquired a smartphone, their mental health and well-being were likely to be lower, the study found" (para. 3) while discussing a study the CNN Health site conducted under their parenting forum. They advocate for not allowing children under the age of 13 to have a smartphone, stating it is unnecessary when looking at how there is more harm coming from them as opposed to good. To take that away entirely is fortunate for the child's well-being, but understandably difficult in the world today. To set time limits or overall limiting access and usage while not at school is even a step up from full access.
Additionally, Annie Margaret describes a study done on 500 college-aged students over the course of four weeks. She describes how they feel addicted, and even have clinically addictive habits towards social media and their phone, and by setting goals and following through with them, even after only four weeks, they felt much better about how they were using their smartphones (para. 14–17). The connection between creating a healthy goal and following through made them feel better, especially when they were able to step back and realize they only used their phone to communicate with close friends and family. Even warping this to fit a child at age 14, having them only use their phone for talking and maybe a single game that includes their friends, and working on doing less phone time and more in-person friend time over the course of a month or two, will help. Margaret states there are practical steps, like firstly turning off notifications (para. 24). There is an understanding amongst many people that constantly checking notifications affects dopamine levels, by creating this feeling of wantedness or liked-ness every time someone gets a "like" on a post or reaction image to text—the more notifications one gets, the better. By removing the notifications entirely, the dependency on "hits" from them can remove the desire to even be on the phone. Additionally, limiting or removing the apps that children do not really need will help limit what they can do with the phone. Making sure that it really is just text, call, track if necessary. Lastly, Margaret mentions turning the smartphone's color scale to gray, which would, in turn, create a less appealing visual. By doing that, one might want to look at the smartphone less, ignoring it.
Yes, smartphones are a part of everyday life, and everyone is expected to have one. However, limiting children's access to smartphones does not mean depriving them of necessary communication or safety. In fact, providing devices that only allow talk and text ensures the safety of children in being able to reach their parents and trusted contacts without the distractions and risks posed by social media and entertainment apps. If parents are worried about being able to reach their children during the school day, phones with call and text provide that solution in emergencies. Additionally, schools can establish guidelines that allow students to check in with parents before and after school, allowing for families to have that peace of mind without opening the door to constant and unnecessary screen time. As previously stated, creating healthy habits supports the children's mental health.
A common objection to the concern is that children may miss out socially if their phone is limited. This concern is valid, but if communities work together to establish similar guidelines, children are less likely to feel excluded or left out in group settings. Additionally, face-to-face interaction and real-world social skills are necessary and pushed to be better when phone usage is limited. Limiting the smartphones creates a more balanced environment where children can stay connected for safety and communication, while being protected from the negative effects of excessive screen time. Ultimately, this approach does need the support of the community, but is overall helpful towards both the practical needs of parents and the well-being of children.
It's time for families, schools, and communities to come together and rethink how we introduce technology to our children. By prioritizing safety and healthy development over constant connectivity, we can make a meaningful difference in our children's lives. I urge parents to have these open conversations with each other and their schools about limiting smartphone and online usage to only call and text. We need to set a new standard, one that values real-world connections and creates safety for our children's mental health. Advocate alongside me for responsible, balanced smartphone usage so our children now and children in the future can thrive in every space they have.
To truly support the children's best interests, parents must move beyond just good intentions and create these protective, proactive steps to meaningful boundaries between the children and unhealthy habits. This begins at home, with clear expectations and consistent routines. Parents can establish "phone-free zones" such as bedrooms, dining areas, and family spaces, allowing children to mentally separate rest, connection, and schoolwork from digital stimulation. Creating set times during which phones are stored in a common area—such as a kitchen drawer or charging station—helps children experience periods of uninterrupted focus and emotional rest. These simple structures show kids that phones are tools, not extensions of themselves.
Families can also model good digital behavior. When parents demonstrate healthy habits, like putting their own phones away during meals or conversations, children learn that real relationships deserve full attention. Another powerful step is guiding children in making intentional choices about their apps and screen use. Sitting down together to remove unnecessary apps, turn off notifications, or install parental controls encourages collaboration rather than punishment, making healthy boundaries something children understand rather than resent.
More importantly, parents should remain engaged and communicative. The issue between children and their unhealthy, borderline addictive habits towards online status and social media is unfortunate, but together, with continuing research and help from everyone within the community, children will be okay. Overall, the primary goal in the end is the children's well-being and safety, so as long as that is the continued conversation topic, it will be helped. It will take a lot of work, but the studies have shown that addictive screen usage is becoming an issue and therefore needs to be talked about, communicated in every possible way.